I Fought the Laws and Lost Miserably

I Fought the Laws and Lost Miserably

the laws of attraction
guarantee, the falling ink
will blot on my trousers

and the law of thermodynamics
make it certain, my hand warmer
will certainly burn me

and as always the laws of motion
will laugh as I spit in the wind
by flinging it back at me

the laws of politics
always mocking my beliefs
except when they’re trivializing me

somehow the law of opposites
remain a complete mystery
more alone and nothing to see

the laws of philosophy
old men arguing over trivial things
move along, nothing to see

following the law of the sea
is another way of saying
that the storm is following me

not enamored by the law of reflection
everything trivial comes my way
while important things bounce away

trusted in the law of faith
nothing goes my way
no matter how much I believe

in awe at the laws of power
not by their great production
instead by the great corruption

the laws of economics
a fancy way of explaining
why what I want is always out of stock

plus the law of diminishing returns
adds another layer of misery
the harder I work, the less I seem to gain

and finally the law of evolution
perhaps the cruelest law of all
means I’m destined to be a fossil

Author’s Notes

Sometimes we have to look at life through the eyes of someone who feels the world is completely and totally against them to find humor.

If you enjoyed this poem, and would like to read more from this author, check out his page on this site.

R.J. Schwartz also owns and writes all the content on The Gypsy Thread, a website dedicated to all things strange, unique, abstract, pagan, and outside of the mainstream

R J Schwartz
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R J Schwartz

I write about everything and sometimes nothing at all. I'm fascinated by old things, rusty things, abandoned places, or anywhere that a secret might be unearthed. I'm passionate about history and many of my pieces are anchored in one concept of time or another. I've always been a writer, dating back to my youth, but the last decade has been a time of growth for me. I'm continually pushing the limitations of vocabulary, syntax, and descriptive phrasing.

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