Shopping With an Influencer

Her beauty tiptoed in timidly but she let her arrogance stroll
From a distance, she laughingly made preparations
First, the fake smile to lend cover to the scorn
The one she regularly regurgitates when it suits her
Walking, talking, it’s all just acting
She’s convinced herself, she’s center stage
Smoke and mirrors and both hands out in full demand
Minions lapping up the trail of sewage she leaves behind
Wanna-be’s, with their tongues forking, sampling the polluted air
And she pretends to care as they scramble for position
Lazily forming up, as a bubble of sycophants and nodders
A factual safe space of human waste
Grown up children, who find perverse pleasure in rudeness
Intentionally playing the game of ‘whoops’ untidiness
Traipsing though the aisles with a dangling hand
Objects falling, chosen interference, then trampled underfoot
Perverse cackling of a petulant mob
Her nose twisted up, and a sneer for her lipstick
Narcissistic ignorance in a shallow pond of her own making
Better than you, and you, and you too, but it doesn’t end
It’s as if her endorsement actually matters
Just because she calls herself an influencer
Mocking the little people and the styles they wear
Putting them down, making them frown
But the mean girl thing only works when people care
Of course her phone held high for her entourage to mimic
Discussing selfie strategies in front of the perfume counter
Not actually buying, and the intention isn’t there
How dare the help actually speak to her!
The shot is ruined, the damage has been done
Catastrophe, that these people invaded her camera space
A controlled and contrived fit of outrage follows
Don’t they know who I am !
I’m an influencer after all !
I demand and deserve complete subjugation
Give me something free and I might forgive
It better be top shelf, indeed
Or that’s what her assistant will tell you
She never speaks to little people in real life
She’s above and they’re below
Or at least she thinks it’s so
To most of us, she entertainment
A blip among blips in a great big world
Soon her up, will point back down
Who wants to worship me today?
I’m waiting…

Author’s Notes

Our world is filled with too many self-appointed brats who call themselves influencer. Too bad there aren’t enough people who want to be influenced by them. They are demanding and expect lots of free stuff, but in exchange all they offer is an Instagram posting or flash live video. Unless they are an A-level celebrity, this adds up to about zero sales.

More by this writer can be found here and here.

R J Schwartz
Latest posts by R J Schwartz (see all)

R J Schwartz

I write about everything and sometimes nothing at all. I'm fascinated by old things, rusty things, abandoned places, or anywhere that a secret might be unearthed. I'm passionate about history and many of my pieces are anchored in one concept of time or another. I've always been a writer, dating back to my youth, but the last decade has been a time of growth for me. I'm continually pushing the limitations of vocabulary, syntax, and descriptive phrasing.

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