I Confess…
Confess I do to human failings,
besmirched by so many mental ailments,
that the course of life is never straight,
never straight forward, I negotiate
the fibrous ribbons of my direction
meandering so at the fate of my libations,
hoping for a helping hand,
an inkling of a sane command,
always an expectation, but rarely an occurrence.
My fate is mine alone, potential yes,
but so prone to jeopardy,
my own hand’s slippery grasp of life’s breadth,
its puzzling depth of rendering, my own avail,
yet in quandary I move through its unveiling,
always questions, always the edge of failing,
at the expense of my ego,
ergo my dull resound,
my deflated wreck of a persona.
I too confess my ability, my insight,
my light, my hostility,
all within the realms of human, yet assume not I am,
for this soul is clouded by other worlds,
leaning in, the voices of other times rhyme
with this earthly life and hold me not alone,
but many I have been, elsewhere,
and not being of this world shall not fit in,
out on a limb I ride the cosmic express.
Still I digress, for off planet I miss,
an empty whole of what I’ve been,
and in this human flesh, remiss of much I’ve seen,
the turbulence of this empathetic mind
is more than a soul can bear,
and within this human despair I flounder,
my shrouded bones on tenterhooks,
my memories a grace of distant touch,
as I think too much, should not even know I’m here.
But here I am, in pieces,
struck with the human stick, the ticks of lowly souls,
learning to grow in this vast universe,
baby steps and lots of rest to quantify
the balance I try to maintain,
in the name of life, of what can be
when souls follow paths to become whole,
when lives finally meet in the rapture
of the divine.
Tony DeLorger © 2018
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Such a heart-warming confession beautifully penned from your soul, and a plea for a helping hand. I reach out to you with a helping hand to give you what support, compassion, understanding, and kindness you should need. It is one of my purposes in life to do so – and, because you are my dear friend, I am here for you, Tony.
Glad you appreciated this all too human quandary, Phyllis. You are kind and you do support with kindness. Its good to vent these types of feelings, as our human state is filled with inequity and often confusion. Take care.