I Have No Voice For Song – But I Sing Along

I have no voice for song

My words headstrong

With a powerful message

But they just come out wrong


Some say too flat

Others remark

Just a tarry too sharp

Kind of like a screaming cat


Without any training

I’ll never improve

I don’t expect

Any jobs entertaining


So I smile and accept my fate

The swirling songs would be great

As lyrical poetry

Nice to contemplate


I know I sound great to myself

When I’m showering

Or shaving

Surrounded by no one else


Top billing in my bathroom studio

The mirror aglow

My audience of one

Always here for the nightly show


I belt out jazz at the top of my lungs

Switch to rock or pop

Singing loud, I never stop

Some would say I sing in tongues


Hopefully the walls contain

My sharpish screeches

Flattened speeches

No sense in sharing the pain


With my razor mic

I sway and dance

Twirl and prance

Depending what I feel like


While deep inside I’m apprehensive

If the door would open

My voice ‘a croaking

I’d certainly be on the defensive


It’s the risk of song

I’ve recognized

Untalented, but I feel alive

Something I knew all along


My audience of one, decides

When the performance ends

And my day begins

I’m never, ever criticized


With an open ear

I’m listening

For a chuckle or a giggle

But hoping I won’t hear


Pulling open the door

Quick and sure

I glance in the hall

Down on the floor


No critics hiding

But I’m still deciding

Are they laughing

At what I’m providing


Entertainment of the comedic kind

Maybe that’s what they find

By listening to my howling

Hilariously raw and unrefined


As I step on the path

I try not to laugh

At my foolish thoughts

And the aftermath


I have great words

Some rarely heard

But singing is another matter

I’ll just leave it to the birds

Looking for More Laughs?

Nonsense Poetry

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R J Schwartz

I write about everything and sometimes nothing at all. I'm fascinated by old things, rusty things, abandoned places, or anywhere that a secret might be unearthed. I'm passionate about history and many of my pieces are anchored in one concept of time or another. I've always been a writer, dating back to my youth, but the last decade has been a time of growth for me. I'm continually pushing the limitations of vocabulary, syntax, and descriptive phrasing.

6 thoughts on “I Have No Voice For Song – But I Sing Along

  • January 26, 2018 at 9:36 PM

    Okay, my dear friend. After reading your wonderful poem I’ve a new goal. I can teach you to sing! Yes, I can. Are you up for it?

  • January 26, 2018 at 11:32 PM

    I’m said to be flat as a proverbial pancake and I have perpetual gravel voice as I get older – not exactly top shelf material – ha ha ha

  • January 27, 2018 at 2:02 AM

    Not all of us can be pop stars, but singing is a wonderful outlet for those lost dreams. Very much enjoyed Ralph.

  • August 31, 2018 at 8:35 PM

    Haha, this brought a smile. I can’t sing to save myself either (when others are around) but I sound great to my own ears. Good job, Ralph.


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