Step right up, Come One and Come All
Prepare yourselves to enter the Hall!
Welcome everyone, to the Underworld’s Fair
Halloween Never Ends, so I bid you Beware!
Make way for the Ghosts and the Beasts and Trolls
The Slithery things that come out from their Holes!
Vampires and Things that go Bump in the Night
Witches on Brooms find Delight in your Fright!
Mummies with loose Wrappings
Zombies and their Trappings!
Ghouls, Harpies, and a Gargantuan Gnome
Straight-Jacketed patients with eyes colored Chrome!
Werewolves and Spiders and two Undertakers
Grinning schoolboys we call Troublemakers!
A Sparkling Dragon and a few Ugly Ogres
Psychotic Crazies and Murdrous Chokers!
Oh the Underworld’s Fair is full of Suprises
Everyone guilty of so many Vices!
Screams on the Midway, Orbs on the Stages
Corupt Entertainers, Wizards, and Sages!
With Penetrating Eyes they bore through your Soul
Leaving you Empty, Confused, and so Cold!
More people come in than the Number that Go
Eaten, Drained, or lost to the Shadows!
Pulled quickly away from the Crowds and the Rides
Unknowingly Slaughtered, their Flesh did Divide!
Amongst Demons and Devils and Cannibals Too
Warlocks and Priestesses who practice Voodoo
Their Bones Animated, a Living Skeleton
A Magical Plaything, Some Underworld Fun!
So warned are you Human, and Warned You For Real
The Underworld’s Fair is a Dangerous Deal!
Your Luck won’t last if you keep coming Back
Eventually they’ll get you; They’ll send the Hunchback!
He’ll split you in two, like a fresh Loaf of Bread
Lickety Split; Just like that and You’re Dead!
Your face on the posters that seek those who’ve gone Missing
Never again will you mix with the Living!
So take a moment or three before Redeeming that Ticket
Is it really so Important to see that Exhibit?
Is your Life so unworthy you’d risk the Despair
Of a Dark, Rainy Evening at the Underworld’s Fair?