Writers on the Web by Phyllis Doyle Burns
Writers on the Web by Phyllis Doyle Burns
Writers on the web
Writers on the web
To T C E we came
We write with little shame
As a poet seeking fame
Write with flow and ebb
Writers on the web
Story tellers on the look
Their brains are fryin’ so to hook
Readers who want those words
To stir emotions good
And take them all for a ride
So in their hearts abide
Teller on the look, yeah
Poet you gotta love your muse
Teller you gotta love your muse
Give your muse a hand
Listen, understand
Your legacy will depend
On your words without end
Gotta love your muse, yeah
~~~~
This is my entry to the Writers on the Web competition. It was a lot of fun to try and keep the same flow and rhyme sequence as Jim Morrison did in his song Riders On The Storm. I counted syllables in each line and tried to follow the correct rhyme flow. John Hansen quickly came up with the first entry to the competition and made it look so easy, so I thought “I can do this.” It took me longer than I thought, but I sure enjoyed playing with it. Sometimes I am a perfectionist (I can hear John and Ralph laughing at that), and cause myself too much stress, but this time I just delved into it and came up with my version. Hope you like it – and I hope we get a lot more entries.
The syllable count in the three stanzas is:
Stanza one: 5, 5, 6, 6, 7, 5, 5 (World is one syllable in MHO)
Stanza two: 7, 8, 6, 5, 7, 6, 6
Stanza three: 8, 8, 5, 5, 7, 6, 6 (Girl is 2 syllables in MHO)
~~~~
© 2017 Phyllis Doyle Burns
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Good work, Phyllis. I enjoyed your interpretation of the song, and love the pic of Mark Twain too. Yes, he would be proud.
Ah! Thank you, John. I appreciate that. Unfortunately, yours is the only comment I have. Any suggestions? LOL As Tamara says, you are a good sport and that is great. Glad you like Mark Twain’s pic.
Nicely done Phyllis. I too love that photo of Matt Twain. He has always been a favorite writer of mine. I have his huge volume of works in my library. Your poem was tuneful and to the perfect beat. Ineed us Poets gotta love our Muse. They are the true tellers. Truly enjoyable to read. Bravo
Thank you, Vincent. So glad you like it and I appreciate you kind comment. Mark Twain is a favorite of mine, too. Have you ever watched the videos of Hal Holbrook impersonating Twain? They are remarkable and I feel as though it is really Mark Twain giving his lectures. Thanks again, Vincent.
Oh yes I watched Hal Holbrook many years ago do a fabulous interpretation or MT simply blew me away. As well he was so humourus with his diction. Loved it and still watch it time again on Utube.
Wow…lol…I like it! Brilliant! I couldn’t help but to laugh when you wrote, “…We write with little shame…” I found this to be a poem in which I could very much relate. Ha ha. So, now I’ve got your poem, Phyllis, and also John’s poem, continuously playing in my head. I hope I’m not one to talk in my sleep, or else I might start singing each of your poems, and possibly get them intertwined, and then what will my pets think? LOL…
Excellent!
OMG ! You are so funny, Tamara. I can imagine how it would be if you intertwined John’s and my poem – now we have Kurt’s and Tony’s for you to sing also. Thank you so much for the delightful comment. I see you got your gravatar – good job.
Hi Phyllis, I cannot seem to find Kurt’s Poem… I use an IPAD, and I’m not sure if I’m seeing everything. Hope to find the one that Kurt wrote, too 🙂 I’m having a good time reading all of them..lol.
It is fun to read them. I love Tony’s – well I love them all, even mine. LOL
BY KURT JAMES
http://www.creativeexiles.com/2017/07/writers-web-kurt-james/
Loved it Phyllis, everything has a flow and ebb to it. Poetry no exception. Your take on Riders is fantastic to say the least, gotta love the muse when they come around, some of us are fortunate enough to have them stay awhile, others have to make precious time for them, and how true that the legacy depends on your words having no end. Great job Phyllis.
Paul, dear poet, I thank you so much for such a kind comment, and so appreciated.
Great poem, Phyllis. I am just starting to read the entries, and I like them all so far. I love how everyone comes up with a different interpretation of the same subject. I can relate to this poem, Phyllis, sometimes I know my “brains are frying’ so to hook readers”… well, I didn’t notice it before I saw the words, but they ring very true ;).
A really wonderful write Phyllis. We sure got to love our muses other what else is there???
Well done Phyllis! I really enjoyed the incorporation of TCE specifically into your piece, such a nice personal touch, for our first challenge.
Very smooth with a lovely ‘ebb and flow’. 🙂 I enjoyed playing alongside, poet. Enjoyed it!
Best,
Mel
Thank you, Mel. Glad you enjoyed playing. This has been fun for all. Take care.