Big Feet Snot Giants

There once lived a man who had very big feet
He could place one foot in the road and his big toe would be across the street
He did not like animals so he did not eat meat
the only thing that bothered him was the size of his feet

One day he went to town to get some supplies
people stared at his planks some laughed till tears filled their eyes
his feet were always the look of the town
some thought he only needed a round nose to become a clown

he saw a beautiful lady that went to buy a hat
he fell in love immediately so he waited outside the store, on the sidewalk he sat
When she came out he was in awe and in shock
“Oh my” he said, what a huge nose she got

He rushed over to her and introduced himself, “Good day Ma’am, I’m John Abominable”
“I was wondering if for dinner tonight you would be available’?
She blushed and her nose lit up like the North Star
“Of course i would be”, she giggled and walked away with cheeks glowing like a jar

They dated and married and produced two young children
They were twins and went into town and this was the first they had seen em
They had Hugh round nose like their mom, and very big feet like dad
The town laughed and the children became very sad.

The children grew and grew and after sixteen years were as tall as buildings
The parents could not believe that they produced giant siblings.
The two young ones remembered how the town mocked them both
and promised revenge in an oath

They left home one day bright at noon
and went to seek revenge in the town and reached there soon
The people saw them and were afraid and ran and hid
but they could not hide as the giants were too big

The giants sniffled and sneezed them away
and pressed some out under their enormous feet like clay
they smashed and dashed and left nothing upright
They demolished all in their vengeful flight

Their parents heard the destruction and rushed to town to see the doom
but all was left was a squished squash, and a pea on a spoon
They moved away to afar far land where no humans would be
Up until today the song they would sing still resounds in me

fe fi fo fum,
giant wants a chewing gum
fe fi fo me
giant want some camomile tea

Clive Williams
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8 thoughts on “Big Feet Snot Giants

  • July 17, 2017 at 10:26 PM

    Clive, this is hilarious, I love it. There comes a time when we all need a good fairy-tale-type poem and this one is great. Well done.

  • July 18, 2017 at 12:15 AM

    Very funny, Clive, except for the people squashed like peas on a spoon 🙂 (oh “They had *Hugh* round nose like their mom” should be *huge*. I enjoyed this.

  • July 18, 2017 at 6:32 AM

    Hello Phyllis, you know I wrote this piece about 2 years ago and each time I read it I can’t help but laugh.

  • July 24, 2017 at 7:52 AM

    This is so much fun to read, and as I read your tale, I imagine these images and laugh to myself 🙂 This is a wonderful start to a Monday morning! I am so glad for this humor you have shared. Love it!


  • November 10, 2017 at 7:48 PM

    How cheeky! I have been doing research on giants and couldn’t pass this one up. It was a fun read.


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