Five Stages of Grief – Stage One – Denial
Denial
It can happen to anyone
Refusing to believe
That which is there in front of me
I’m choosing not to comprehend
An odd way to defend
Somethings torn that I cannot mend
It can’t be happening
Not to me
Perhaps someone else
Another somebody
But not to me, can’t you see
My eyes are closed
So it can’t be real
My defenses raised
So I cannot feel
It can’t be real
There must be a loophole
My subconscious in control
Repressive, only to withhold
That which I’m not ready for
News that put me on the floor
When I hid behind the closed door
Tragedy cut me to the core
I begged for silence
To hear no more
But the shouting grew inside my head
The voices whispering about the dead
I tried to shut them out
As they continued to shout
Confused to what it was about
Just wanting to bail out
So away I found somewhere to hide
Didn’t wander, just sunk inside
My mind a sheltered place
Outside of time, outside of space
Where nothing comes unless I say
My perfect mental hideaway
Negativity banned
Head in the sand
Regardless of the wasted energy
Hiding what I need to see
Loss and grief are normal, or so they say
Yet, today I’m running away
Withdrawn and isolated
Eyes bloodshot and dilated
Afraid of what’s in store
Uncertainly that’s for sure
Chances are there’s no cure
Not really ready to open that door
Author’s Note
This piece is the first in a series that encompasses the five stages of grief – they are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance. The analysis of human experiences, especially when it comes to how we deal with emotional tragedies, leads to discoveries that are unlike anything else known to humankind. It is with the utmost reverence and respect for those who are currently experiencing any of these stages that I’m undertaking this delicate series of poems. I hope that in some small way, they help someone, anyone, to find the strength to take the next step toward healing and eventually reaching inner peace.
- When We Lost Control - October 13, 2025
- The Crumbling Space Around Me - October 10, 2025
- Sorrow - October 9, 2025
That first stage of grief is a protection till we are ready to accept the truth. It is a subconscious flag to save us from the deepest of pain. When my eldest brother died I embraced denial – I just could not accept that he was gone. You have portrayed this stage so very well, Ralph. Great work.
Thanks Phyllis – I’ve just completed the series and posted each one. Writing these has been so difficult and I found myself tearful as I tried to become one with the work; I’m exhausted but feeling very satisfied.
That is good you feel good about it, Ralph. I understand how tearful it can be. I have tried to write on coping with grief and know just how difficult it is, I couldn’t do it. It must be a healing experience for you, too.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on the complete body of work if you have a chance to read it all the way through. It’s lengthy, but I feel captures the complete cycle through the phases and I’ve tried to add some details that connect the dots, so to speak.
Nicely penned and expressed as to the stages of grief. great work Ralph.