Five Stages of Grief – Stage Four – Depression
Depression
The false hope of bargaining
Selective targeting
Made up marketing
Anything
Something to confound my wounded soul
I’m in the deepest hole
Uncertain of my role
Feigning up only brought me down
Tepid smile back to a frown
When walking in the pines
Made me feel like I was fine
Thought I’d crossed the line
But it wasn’t the right time
Dullness bruising my shine
Realizing I’m still alone
An empty house, no longer a home
Hope it seems has shown
That I’ll continue to be alone
The depression my penalty
For thinking it was light I see
But sadness trapped inside of me
Blinded me temporarily
The will to overcome
Tough for me, easy for some
I’ve got many miles to run
Before the days are better
As summer turns to fall and winter
Thoughts of her begin to splinter
There still there, but not as clear
After all, it’s been a year
The tears still fall, but not so often
The hurt begun to soften
Nights are the worst, sleeping alone
And dreams that postpone
Thoughts of her headstone
Oddly staring at the telephone
The silence that can’t be broken
Even when words are spoken
Their simply token
And I remain heartbroken
I miss her in ways I can’t describe
Some I didn’t recognize
And now I’ll never realize
Just how her being, made me thrive
Mostly my mind is blank
Emotionless, my ship has sank
Resting on the ocean floor
Slowly rusting just offshore
Down with the ship, my good commodore
Nothing worth anything anymore
No idea what life is for
Tiring of trips to the drugstore
Television such a bore
It’s as if I’m searching but not sure for what
A shortcut or feeling in my gut
Bandage for the deepest cut
A wounded heart in need of rescue
Maybe a change of venue
Author’s Note
This piece is the fourth in a series that encompasses the five stages of grief – they are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance. The analysis of human experiences, especially when it comes to how we deal with emotional tragedies, leads to discoveries that are unlike anything else known to humankind. It is with the utmost reverence and respect for those who are currently experiencing any of these stages that I’m undertaking this delicate series of poems. I hope that in some small way, they help someone, anyone, to find the strength to take the next step toward healing and eventually reaching inner peace.
- A Quest For Treasure – A Tribute to Metal Detecting - January 25, 2023
- I’m Listening, There’s No Need to Shout - January 15, 2023
- I Fought the Laws and Lost Miserably - December 28, 2022
Sometimes a phone call to one who will just listen and not advise can be a great help. This stage is so precarious and reaching out to someone for empathy is good therapy. You are doing great with this series, Ralph.