Words I’d Wished Not Spoken
There are conversations
Words I’d wished not spoken
Yet no action will reward my wish
They’ll remain in the universe
No matter how quietly I call them home
Through he said, she said
Networks of whispers and postings
They’ve already crossed the distance
Settled somewhere far beyond my reach
And I’m quite certain, quite sure
That the one point of the words
Has already learned of their life
Now, over and over, suffering in silence
The exacting details still escape me
For what seemed casual, was more than casual
So, I ponder, I think
I turn them again in memory
Much still escapes me of the what
But the why, and the unspoken reasoning
The weight of knowing
Hindsight of speaking without thinking
Now I’m trapped in a wondering why
If only time was my companion
Stepping from one place to another
Finding that space right before
Then a well-planned pause
A shift in another direction
New conversations over the old
That ill-fated speech never happened
Never existed, except for a thought
A splinter in my mind’s eye
Now the distraction haunts me
Weighted moments of what to do
Steps and statements
How to move, whether on or ahead
How will the landing be
Soft or hard, or trapped in flight
There’s no escape, the truth is history
What the past owns, stays a part of it
So, now I stay here, not hiding
Not making excuses for those words
But wondering, holding the truth of it
My mind shaping other words
And somewhere in this quiet
Where regret meets understanding
Something new begins to form, to grow
I’m not seeking forgiveness
Not yet, probably never
Just my own exposure, my learned lesson
Learning never ceases
I want to make certain of knowing
That when the next moment arrives
I’ll remember this moment
This feeling of sorrowful dread
And when the chance happens
I’ll move to that new conversation
Additional Reading
R.J. (Ralph) Schwartz is an American poet, author, website owner, and online publisher. His writing spans several poetry collections—ranging from spiritual and romantic to fear-driven explorations—and even extends into science fiction. Notable works include:
- Normal Was the First Casualty – A Collection of Dystopian Poetry
- Hope – Inspirational and Spiritual Poetry
- Things That Go Bump in the Night – Poetry of Fear and Fright
- The Lover’s Thread – Poetry for Couples
- Poetry of the Human Condition – The Ups and Downs of Modern Living
- The Secrets of the Moon (a sci-fi novel co-authored with his son Sebastian J. Schwartz)
Schwartz’s work is described as purposefully wordy, richly descriptive, and thematically grounded in nature, romance, antiquity, and forgotten histories. He writes regularly on platforms he manages, including The Creative Exiles, a collaborative venue for writers, and The Gypsy Thread, which delves into offbeat histories, pagan lore, and poetry.
- The Gunfight at the O.K. Corral - May 11, 2026
- The Spring Collection - May 8, 2026
- Faces Without Names - May 6, 2026
