Snow White and Prince Charming ~ An Adult Fairy Tale

Snow White and Prince Charming

For countless years fairy tales and nursery rhymes have been popular bedtime reading for young children by their parents. Many do not realise that when they were first written many of these were in fact aimed at an adult audience. Often over the years, the stories were altered to make them more suitable for children. Here I have taken inspiration from the popular story Snow White, turning it on its head, and attempted to give it a modern slant.

Prince Charming:

Do you come here often?

(His corny opening line)

I haven’t seen your name before,

And I’m here all the time.

Snow White:

I’ve only been here once or twice,

It’s not really my scene.

I thought I’d give it one more try,

Most guys are much too keen.

Prince Charming

Your avatar is really cute.

Snow White’s a pretty name.

I know some guys are rather rude,

But we aren’t all the same.

Snow White

‘Prince Charming’, are you joking?

That sounds a little vain.

Do women take you seriously,

Or treat you as insane?

Prince Charming

It’s hard to choose a catchy name,

There’s no need to insult.

I’m sorry you’ve been treated bad,

But it’s really not my fault.

Snow White

Sorry, that was rather mean,

I shouldn’t judge so quick.

It’s just the things that some guys want

Really make me sick.

Actually, you seem quite nice,

You must think I’m a bitch.

The last guy that I chatted with

Had a really charming pitch.

At first, he sounded friendly,

He said his name was ‘Doc’.

His small talk made me feel at ease,

Then he asked, “Do you like c…?”

Prince Charming

It is okay, I understand,

I get that all the time.

Girls in here get hit on lots,

But not all guys are slime.

Some guys are full of compliments,

They know just what to say.

Most of them are online sharks

And women are their prey.

Snow White

I sat there shocked in disbelief,

At first, I couldn’t speak.

“I’m not that type of girl,” I said,

“Just get lost, you creep”

That didn’t even put him off.

He said, “I have six pals.

We like to share and share alike,

Especially pretty gals.”

Prince Charming

Maybe if you’re willing,

I’d like to be your friend.

I hope you find me honest,

And chivalrous to the end.

I know Doc, he’s short and crude,

No wonder you are bitter.

His type is more like what you find

In a tray of kitty litter.

I’m sorry he abused you

He makes us all look bad.

You must think all guys want is sex,

It really is quite sad.

His friends, the Dwarfs are nasty,

They’re horrid and depraved.

They like to have a live-in girl,

To be their little slave.

My computer screen is freezing,

It needs a good reboot.

But just one tip before I go,

Beware of witches bearing fruit.

by John Hansen ©

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John Hansen

Longtime poet but not in the traditional technical sense. I enjoy rhyme but like to experiment and dabble in many different forms and maybe even make up some of my own. There is always a message or lesson I want to promote through my writing, for that reason, my poetry generally shies away from the abstract and obscure.

After a lot of procrastinating I have finally self-published my first eBook of poetry "I Laughed a Smile" at Lulu.com.Now I find myself branching out and experimenting with short fiction.

I have also been fortunate to have two poems chosen to be made into songs and recorded. The first "On the Road to Kingdom Come" by Al Wordlaw, and the second, "If I Could Write a Love Poem" by award-winning Israeli/British singer Tally Koren.

I am also finding my services increasingly in demand as a freelance writer and I have ghost-written the text for a number of children's books and educational tutorials.

It has taken me many years of searching and restlessness to realise that my life's passion is to write. It saddens me that I wasted so many years not devoting to that, but thinking positively, the experiences gained over those years are now wonderful material for my stories and poems.

I want to try to bring a new focus on poetry and try to make it appealing to a new generation of young people and those who thought they never liked or understood it before.

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