The Writer’s Nightmare on Elm Street

Elm Street

Dammit Jim, I’m just a writer

It’s been a funny sort of day, hasn’t it?

You ain’t heard nothing yet, 

Stuck in a nightmare on Elm Street

Where all I smell is napalm in the morning

I feel the need for speed

And right now, Paris within our grasp

Believe me Houston, we have a problem

Fasten your seatbelts as it’s gonna be a bumpy ride 

I see dead people Rosebud,

Why don’t you come see me sometime one remarked

I asked myself in a punkish way if I felt lucky

That thought was elementary my dear, until…

One made me an offer I couldn’t refuse

As God as my witness, I’ll never go hungry again

Maybe letting me eat cake

Is the stuff that dreams are made of

Well, nobody’s perfect

Even when they win one for the gipper 

Or they’re the king of the world

Hasta La Vista Baby, yes you heard me

Baby, take a walk on the wild side

You won’t be in Kansas anymore

Or singing in the rain,

You know how to whistle, don’t you?

Instead a dark and stormy night

Where Warriors come out to play,

They don’t fall down when they’re shot

They’re all going to laugh at you

Be afraid….be very afraid

They’re coming to get you Barbara,

Whatever you do, don’t fall asleep…

Especially while you’re on Elm Street

More From R.J. Schwartz

I Have No Voice For Song – But I Sing Along

Situational Humor Do’s and Don’ts

Visit my other site – The Gypsy Thread

R J Schwartz
Latest posts by R J Schwartz (see all)
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R J Schwartz

I write about everything and sometimes nothing at all. I'm fascinated by old things, rusty things, abandoned places, or anywhere that a secret might be unearthed. I'm passionate about history and many of my pieces are anchored in one concept of time or another. I've always been a writer, dating back to my youth, but the last decade has been a time of growth for me. I'm continually pushing the limitations of vocabulary, syntax, and descriptive phrasing.

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