Here, now, I’m caught in light,
a fragile plight I attest,
teetering on a peripheral line
at the edge of my resolve,
where capability and what’s needed, struggle.
Forever I, the placater of careless, taunted minds,
cannot for long hold onto those I love
with such responsibility,
such innately depleted energy,
my own inadequacies barely addressed.
We, in a baron desert,
crawl in the dust, over rock and parched earth,
each dragging step a painful expenditure,
closer to an oasis so far, yet I push us on,
until we are at water’s edge, yet they will not drink…
not thirsty at all.
I, wasted for the edging on, the persistence,
lying there spent, questioning the purpose,
the journey I feel impelled to take for my son’s sake,
yet who can help someone
who will not help themselves,
but if I cease, can I watch what ensues?
Broken from my tolerance,
my unending support and resolve,
to open doors of healing, bring needed change
and to rearrange their lives
so they can see what I see,
My frustration clouds my mind,
often unable to see the slow changes so subtle
that a new environment has made,
and I cannot push them more
otherwise they’ll break,
and I too weak to afford the impact.
Depression is a difficult ailment,
an insidious clouding of truth
and the procreation of comforting lies,
cycles to be broken and steps to be taken,
to find clarity in the real world,
as life the struggle moves forward.
Tony DeLorger © 2018
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