It’s a Weird Wor(l)d – a Poem of Puns

Phyllis’s Challenge

In Phyllis Doyle’s humorous piece “Six Pack to Go” she issued a challenge to try and come up with a funnier piece of humour. I realise that was written some time ago, but she didn’t stipulate a time limit. This poem “It’s a Weird Wor(l)d” is my attempt.

It’s a Weird Wor(l)d – a Poem of Puns

Why are boxing rings not round? I ponder,

And confused fighters told, “Move to the corner!”

My closest relative’s my father,

But a long way distant is known as farther.

Why do fish hang around in schools?

Who teaches them the golden rules?

And what about a herd of cattle,

Does this mean you can hear them rattle?

If a blue movie is rated “R”,

Does that mean a smurf is not the star?

If parks are places that you play,

Do cars have fun when we’re away?

One fish is fish, and more are too,

One sheep is sheep, and so are ewe.

One mouse is mouse, and two are mice,

So why is not two houses, hice?

One male is man, and two are men,

One female’s woman, two women,

So if one person is a human,

It means that two should be humen.

If we strike gold or oil, we’re rich,

But a strike in baseball is a bitch.

Travelling on a plane’s a trip,

So is falling over and breaking your hip.

The World Wide Web has many sites,

And a unit of measure is called a bite.

The world called Earth has many sights,

A curve in coastline is called a bight.

This poem is full of many puns,

But please don’t point those nasty guns.

I know bad jokes are not the trend,

So, I’ll bring this one to an end.

by John Hansen © 2016