The Lessons from a Special Soul

The Lessons from a Special Soul
The Lessons from a Special Soul

Kim was my first born child, a beautiful soul far beyond my understanding at the time. A freak of nature caused a physical twist in her bowl and for four months she battled life, and I with her. During that time, amid all her endless operations and pain, she gave unconditional love in the most dire of circumstances. A smile that would melt the polar caps would emanate from a distorted, swollen head, her veins tapped for the drugs that kept her alive. To watch a new life transcend pain and give so freely was more than humbling, it was trans-formative, and in many ways this little soul saved me, from a life of ignorance, her beauty the path of learning that even today marks my life. I hope you enjoy this expression of feelings.

When death treads so lightly
at the periphery of life,
it is a burden that begs attention,
a pain that forever weighs down hope,
and its presence although slight,
is so impending, the reality itself
can lose a mind in anticipation.

The fear and the worry
becomes like a blanket that envelopes all life,
no thought escapes without that tinge
of dark possibility,
the fear of loss so pervading,
each breath is held to ransom,
and the body slowly turns to stone.

As life struggles for longevity,
the undulations between hope and hopeless
become the center of life,
each step like walking on glass,
each breath the burden of pain,
and experience excruciating
in a tunnel of numb minded existence.

Then when the end comes,
the mind is torn
between relief and the ultimate pain of loss,
so interwoven that feelings fade from understanding,
and a storm of unexplained feelings,
just hover above, like an anesthetic mist,
trying to numb what nerves remain.

My daughters passing was so silent and effortless,
having given all to the struggle,
she just new it was time and surrendered,
and for me it was a blessing of relief,
that she did not have to face even more suffering,
even more courage to fight for her place,
instead to accept her plight, with love.

I was not so eloquent in understanding and thought,
grieving so tumultuously,
it formed cracks in my earth,
cracks that would take many years to heal,
but I will never forget the courage and love
from this my daughter lost,
who, in her short life, loved with all her heart.

Tony DeLorger © 2017

Tony DeLorger
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Tony DeLorger

Full time author, freelance writer, poet and blogger since 1999. Twenty one published works, past winner of 'Poet of the Year' on HubPages, 'Poem of the Year' on The Creative Exiles, writer for, Google+, videos on YouTube and book sales on website, Amazon and

3 thoughts on “The Lessons from a Special Soul

  • February 11, 2017 at 9:38 PM

    Tony, I remember your first poem about Kim. She was a beautiful, loving soul. Her smile through pain was a sign that she knew how much you loved her and how much comfort you gave her. You both gave to each other in a precious and memorable way. Thank you for sharing your beloved Kim with us. Your poem is beautiful, so much wisdom in it.

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